Congrats to the Easter giveaway winner. Jenny. Timestamp: March 26 at 11:25 am Send me your mailing address at karen@proverbs31.org asap so I can get you gift out to you

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I know many of you are joining us after clicking over from the devotion I have running at Proverbs 31 and on Crosswalk.com. If you haven’t read the devotion, click here so the rest of the post makes sense! Be sure to come back to finish reading this and enter the giveaway!

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Have you ever encountered the backwards ways we measure success in our society?

• School teachers who pour their lives into students or nurses who care for the sick earn modest wages.
• However, those who can shoot an orange ball through a hoop or smack a tiny white one down a fairway make millions.
• People who pour their lives into working with the poor or homeless go virtually unnoticed.
• Others who write vulgar lyrics set to rap music are adored by scores of fans worldwide.

Or how about the time and money we spend? Anything backwards there?

• Couples drop thousands of dollars in order to put on an elaborate wedding, but think a hundred bucks is too much to spend on a biblically-based marriage conference.
• Those same love birds will spend countless hours planning the ceremony, reception and every last detail of the day right down to registering for the type of  dish towels they simply must have.
• Yep– lots of time planning the wedding. Little time preparing for the actual marriage relationship.

Why is it that we expend great amounts of energy on the outward and often ignore the things of our inner selves? Have we never heard God weigh in on all of this? Read these verses from the devotion again:

“But the LORD said to Samuel, ‘Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him. For the LORD sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the LORD looks on the heart.’” I Samuel 16:7 (ESV)

Peter 3:3-4, “Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious.” (ESV)

The Lord sees more than the external. He sees straight to our hearts. While he is not against us working on our outward appearance, it certainly is not priority number one for Him.

To boil it all down, He isn’t against pearls, He’s just more concerned with personality.

He doesn’t forbid getting your hair spruced up. He just rather you spend as much effort on your heart as your hair.

Maybe even more.

For those of you who are parents, this topic can be a challenging one. While we certainly want to encourage our kids to excel academically, musically or in athletics, we must be even more concerned with their character.

I’ll say it again as in the devotion. Who we are inside is really who we are.

So applaud those efforts as much as the A on the math test or the starting position on the ball team.

In fact, make a big deal about it. I mean why not take a kid our for a treat when he is diligent to study every night for a week for his big exam? Reward his diligence. Yes, don’t just wait until you find out what grade he or she gets on their Friday exam. Take them out on Thursday night to say “way to go!” for studying faithfully Monday-Thursday. Reward faithfulness, not just an A.

Or catch them modeling Christ.

Did they hold the door open for an elderly woman at the grocery store without prompting from you?

Swing by a favorite soda shop and treat them to a “mom-never-lets-us-buy-this” goodie.

Did they do something wrong (which angered you greatly) but then later admitted their fault (which made you pleased)?

Time for a date with you to do something they love (even if it is something you can’t stand)

{Ahem…..later today I am trekking off to the Detroit Zoo for an impromptu trip with my youngest and a friend from his homeschool academy to reward him for a huge behaviour change. Hello? I am no animal lover. I’d rather have a root canal than go to the zoo but he and his friend ADORE animals, so off we go. Don’t think of me as martyr mom. They’ll be a Starbucks in this trip somewhere for me. I have a gift card from my birthday to use up }

But I digress.

Today I want to offer a giveaway that will enable you to reward your kiddos for their inner qualities.

It is called the Family Enrichment Tool kit and it was developed by my friend Michelle Weber a Proverbs 31 She Speaks graduate. Here is what is said about this on our P31 website store:

We are thrilled to have discovered a unique gift idea for any family. The Family Enrichment Toolkit was developed, practically in our own backyard, by a She Speaks graduate. Michelle Weber’s toolkit provides parents with a fun way to instill positive virtues and character in their children, while building stronger family relationships. The kit includes a 12″ lead-free ceramic plate, plate stand, a set of 250 Table Thyme Activity cards with discussion topics and questions, and a 28 minutes CD that will walk you through the incredibly simple steps to making the toolkit an invaluable part of your family.

Michelle developed this because she had one child who was a star gymnast with lots of pats on the back and public praise while her other child has special needs. She wanted to be able to provide an “atta girl” to her as well for efforts she made. Thus, this wonderful idea was born!

We have one of these plates that we use in our own family. And we even use it with extended family.

The gist is this: You decorate the plate with your own family name. Then it becomes the “Smith Family Honor Plate” (The finished product is durable and washable and it is easy to do) Then, catch your kids (or spouse) exhibiting any fruit of the spirit– love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness or self-control. When they do, serve them their dinner on the family honor plate and reward them for this inner quality. There is also a cd that explains this concept more fully and great discussion starter cards for family dinner time. Click here for more info.

Okay…leave a comment today to be entered in the drawing for on of two Family Enrichment Toolkits. It can be a comment about any aspect of this topic, or if time is tight, simply say “I’m in!” Winners will be announced on Wednesday.

Backwards Blessings,

Hi friends!

We are just heading out the door to take Mitch to his first high school baseball tournament in Indiana so this will be short and sweet. (And we are leaving Spence home with his Aunt Thais. They are two peas in a pod of fun and frolic. I hope the house is still standing when we return!)

Anyhow…..Giveaway time!

Here is a fun kitchen giveaway I’ll be shipping out Monday to one of you who leaves a comment any time this weekend. It includes:

• A set of colorful Easter cookie cutters
• Two springy kitchen towels
• A Paula Dean Mango Chutney candle

(Sorry. No picture. Camera is already packed and we are running late.)

Ok. This is simple.

Leave a comment about your favorite aspect of Easter.

That’s it!

Winner will be announced Monday. Be sure to tune back in then. I’ll have a devotion running at Proverbs 31 and on Crosswalk.com and will be offering and even bigger giveaway you won’t want to miss.

Happy weekend!

Often after a speaking event, I am approached by women with a little dream and a few ideas tucked deep into their hearts.

They want to know how I ever got started speaking and writing and if there are any tips I could give them. At times like that, my mind wanders back.

Back to the days when I had a folder of ideas in my desk and a bundle of notions in my brain. I also had a few mentors and friends who guided me and offered tips that lead to my speaking ministry and then, to magazine articles, blogging and four published books.

I have had the pleasure of helping a few local friends in the same way, thereby “paying back” in a sense the kindness that was shown to me. And I often get emails from cyber friends who want to know if I could help them too.

Oh how I wish I had unlimited time to do just that. It really is one of my heart’s desires. However, my clock only gives me 24 hours each day.

Bummer.

And since I must live my prioroties–God, Todd, kiddos and so on. I just don’t have the free time right now to do much one-on-one.

Several of my P31 sisters feel just the same way, especailly our president Lysa. Years ago, she began a weekend away for just such women (and those who are interested in blogging and women’s ministry too) It is called She Speaks.

I attended 5 years ago AFTER I had been speaking for over a decade already.

Man, did I wish I’d gone to that conference years earlier!

This week, Lysa is offering a scholarship contest to help women attend.  I so love and look forward to She Speaks each year and all the connections that are made there for women. For the next few days, I am closing my comments and sending you to Lysa’s site so you can read all about this wonderful opportunity.

Who knows, I might just see you there and we can chat in person!

Have a wonderful week. I’ll be back on Weight Loss Wednesday,

Sweet Blessings,

This morning, my schedule is full, but my brain is blank.

Although I have many topics and ideas waiting in the wings to discuss with our girlfriends group of cyber-sisters, I simply haven’t the time nor energy to tackle them on this Thursday morning. Over and over again God keeps nudging me to practice what I preach and live my priorities; make sure how I spend my time matches up with what I say my priorities are. So….

I have a house that needs cleaning. Dinner to throw in the crock pot for my boys and hubby. Car pools to run for one boy to the homeschool academy and the other to baseball. A bridal shower to put on for a soon-to-be daughter-in-law of a deacades’ long friend.

Oh…and I’m sure Jesus would like if I carved out a little time to connect with Him, since I say He is priority # one.

So blogging will have to wait a day or two.

In the mean time, let me ask YOU to provide some posting ideas here. What would you like to see talked about here on our little ole’ blog in the coming months? Mothering? Marriage? Spring cleaning? Something spiritual? Something practical? Something in between?

Do share…….. but only if you have the time……

I’m off to live my priorities…..

I just returned from an exhaustingly wonderful weekend speaking at the Hearts at Home National conference. It is always a blast to connect with old friends there like her and her, meet new ones like her and her, go out to for a scrumptious Italian dinner with authors like her and her and then stay up late in the hotel laughing til my Depends needed to kick in with funny gal her.  And always, I get to spend time with Hearts founder Jill Savage. Jill and husband Mark’s newest book Living with Less so your Family has More just released and I’ve invited them to share a little bit about this great resource!

Tell us a little bit about yourself and your family.

We have been married for 27 years…17 of them happily. After finding ourselves in a marriage counselor’s office around year 8 or so, we realized that we really didn’t know how to be married. We worked hard to turn things around and now we like to share that hope with other couples.

We have five children ranging from 13 to 25. Our oldest three are married. Anne (25) and her husband, Matt, live in Zion, IL, and are expecting our first grandchild in April. (We are very excited!) Evan (22) and his wife, Julie, have been married a year and a half and they live just a few miles from us. Erica (19) married her husband Kendall last September. They live in Augusta, GA, and wherever else the Army takes them.

We have two teenagers still at home. Kolya just turned 16. He’s learning to drive and we’ve nearly worn a hole in the carpet on the floor in the passenger seat trying to find that non-existent brake pedal. Kolya is the newest member of the Savage family. We adopted him at the age of nine from Russia.

Austin is 13 and in the 8th grade. He wants us to make sure and tell the world that this “living with less” life is a real bummer because he’s the ONLY kid in 8th grade who doesn’t have a cell phone.

Tell us about your newest book Living With Less So Your Family Has More?

The world screams the message that bigger is always better, but we have found that is not often true. When it comes to raising a family, less materially can actually result in more relationally. Children don’t need the best houses, the best lessons, the best cars, or the best clothes. What they really need is the best home life and the best family relationships we can give them.

Why did you want to write this book?

We didn’t start out with the “less is more” mindset. We started as a double income family wanting to have the “best” of everything. Then Mark decided to pursue ministry. We went from the “high life” to the “frugal life” very quickly as we moved to another state for him to go to Bible College full-time.

That experience introduced us to the concept that less is more. We definitely had less money, but we had more time. We had less stress and more peace. We had less activities and more fun.

Since that experience, we’ve continued to live primarily on one income for the past twenty years. We’ve had to battle cultural peer pressure and make different decisions for our family than many other families in our neighborhood have made. But we’ve never felt that we were materially depriving ourselves or our kids…instead we’ve focused on what we’ve actually been able to provide for them emotionally and relationally.

What do you hope your readers will gain from this book?

We hope the reader is encouraged to evaluate how they are living their life, spending their money, and thinking about family matters. Our goal is to introduce families to the “less is more” concept and then equip them with the attitudes and actions to actually make that happen.

For families that are already committed to less is more, we hope to bolster their resolve and help them stay focused on the long-term goal of providing relationally for their kids.

In today’s economy, there are many families being forced to live with less. We want to help them see the opportunity they have with this unexpected downsizing they’ve been forced to do.

And for those who have just been a little discontent with their life and saying things like, “I’m tired of the rat race of life,” or “Is there more to life than drive-thru meals for dinner?” we hope to help them see other choices they have and how they can lead their family in a different direction.

What unique elements will the reader find in Living With Less So Your Family Has More?

For couples who want to read the book together, we’ve included discussion questions at the end of every chapter. This helps move the readers to discussion and eventually actions. Even a single parent can use the discussion questions for personal evaluation.

Readers will find this book a practical guide to changing your attitude and your actions to live a successful “less is more” life. They’ll find our writing style to be a warm, casual, honest discussion where we not only share our victories but our mistakes along the way. We are an average couple living successfully on an average income who want to help others to see the possibilities before them.

This is a Hearts at Home book. What is Hearts at Home?

Hearts at Home is an organization that encourages, educates, and equips women in the profession of motherhood. Hearts at Home encourages moms through annual conferences, our extensive website (www.hearts-at-home.org), a free electronic newsletter, a radio program, and an entire line of books designed to meet the needs of moms all over the world!

Any closing thoughts?

It’s healthy for parents to occasionally pause and evaluate their vision for their family and the choices they are making. We hope this resource will help them do that together and that it will lead them to live a life of little regret.

Now for the giveaway…..

The Savages are giving a copy of their book to one of you and I’m throwing in some gold chocolate coins for the kiddos. (okay…if mom doesn’t snatch them up first– your call!) Simply leave a comment on this post related to the topic of money. How do you save it? Where to you blow it? What questions do you have about budgetting? Why would you like this book? Or, if time is short, just leave a $$$$ and you’ll be entered! Seriously! The drawing is random Winner announced Wednesday.

Well, I’m back to my wonderful, daily life with the kiddos and hubster. Check back in later this week for Weight Loss Wednesday and more. And if we just met at Hearts at Home, please let me know that in the comment section. I’d love it if you said “hi!”

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By the way—-Thanks for all the birthday wishes! The winners of my birthday cupcakes are as follows:

*Candle:  Susan; timestamp 3/10 at 10:46 am

*Homespun Memories book: Olivia; timestamp  3/10 at 10:43 am

*Chocolate: Gabriela; timestamp 3/10 at 4:25 pm

*Starbucks card: Debbie; timestamp 3/10 at 3:24 pm

*Herb tea and heart diffuser: Laurie; timestamp 3/10 at 12:189 pm

Congrats friends! Send me your mailing address at karen@proverbs31.org

Budgetting Blessings,

If  you are a Weight Loss Wednesday gal looking for our weekly check-in, scroll down. It is here….

If you are checking in to see who won the giveaway of Susie Larson’s book Growing Grateful Kids it is: Ann. Timestamp March 10th at 8:11 am. Email me at karen@proverbs31.org with your home address. Congrats!

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Today is my birthday.

In about an hour at 9:04 am, I will turn 46. My mom tells me I was born in the middle of a snow storm and they almost didn’t make it to the hospital.

I debated telling you that it was my birthday. It seems all self-centered and such. But when I hopped on Facebook this morning and saw that several friends (whom I know also read this blog) had already sent me well-wishes, I figured I’d better fess up.

Truthfully, I have a love/hate relationship with birthdays.

I love memories of them.

Especially recollections of taking cupcakes to my class at Delta Center Elementary School in Lansing, MI. Mom let me help in the kitchen then, mixing, baking, frosting and sprinkling those dozens of masterpieces. Then, I got to tote them all the way to school. (I was what they called a ‘walker’, meaning I lived less than a mile from school so no bus ride. I had to walk.)

As I have grown older, I have come to dread birthdays. Not because of the getting older part. You know, when everything heads south. My husband and I realize that, as my friend Debi asserts, we are all headed toward ugly. That part doesn’t bother me so much since we have committed to grow old and ugly together and have lots of fun doing it.

I dread them because I sometimes get my feelings hurt due to my expectations.

I think my kids will instinctively wake up and say, “Happy Birthday mom. You are the greatest! You sacrifice so much for us. I already got up and made your coffee for you.”

Instead, they say…”Mooooooooom……I am starving. Is breakfast ready yet?

I fancy my relatives will give me a quick call to wish me a happy birthday.

The phone doesn’t ring.

I can’t help but think of the friends I remembered to give a little something to on their big day.

I run into one of them in Walmart and she never even tells me Happy Birthday.

I…..I….I…..

Oh ladies…I so desire to be a low-maintenance friend, wife and mom. I don’t want to be self-centered. Especially on my birthday.

I want to rewind to the days when what made me so very giddy every March 10th were those sweet and colorful cupcakes taken to my classmates.

So…..I have decided….zero expectations from me today.

Instead, I want to give away cupcakes.

What that looks like is this:

Leave a comment today about your most memorable birthday. (or any other birthday-related message)

I will choose five winners who will get one of the following “cupcakes” from me.

• A For Every Body brand “Birthday Cake” scented candle for you (with cute sprinkles on top) to burn at your house each time someone turns a year older.
• A copy of the book on simple and creative celebrations entitled Homespun Memories for the Heart that I wrote with friends Kelly Hovermale and Trish Smith.
• A bag of Hershey’s Milk Chocolate Melt-Away Hearts with raspberry filling
• A $5.00 Starbucks card
• A box of Snapple Brand Wild About Berries Herb Tea with a heart-sheaped tea difusser

There—- I feel better already. Jesus is so right. It is more blessed to give than receive. (Acts 20:35)

Now, when you leave your comment, please tell me what ‘cupcake’ you’d enjoy winning (or simply indicate ‘any of them’) Winners announced Monday.

Oh, and in this day and age of Facebook….is there anyone out there who went to Delta Center elementary with me in the 1970′s? I’d get a hoot out of knowing!

Cupcake-coated Blessings,