Okay folks.

I’ve about had it.

If you read my last post, you’ll know things have been less than peachy-keen around here lately.

It is only getting worse.

Kenna, our 19 year-old daughter who was in an accident 14 hours away in NC and now is borrowing a car from a friend’s Grandpa (who is a doctor, by the way! ) called last night to say the borrowed car’s warning lights were a blinking and there were fluids and smoke shooting and rising from under the hood and what should she do?

Oh, and she had my friend Lysa’s little girl with her. In an unfamiliar part of town. (And she just called to say Lysa’s other daughter wants to take her cliff jumping today. Hello? With the events of late that have happened to that girl, she should be NO WHERE near a cliff!)

Then, this morning, I decided to hop on here as usual on a Wednesday morning to provide some encouragement to those of us trying to drop some unwanted pounds. I actually was going to post an interview with a friend that you will love! I have it neatly saved in an email file, so all I needed to do this morning was pull it up and post.

However, my delightful email carrier of over ten years (who shall remain nameless but who does NOT get an A from me because I think they are O so frustrating that they make me want to yell, which rhymes with L !!!) anyway, the site will not allow me to access my mailbox. And it has been this way for two hours!!!

So, I am off to pray, to smash something (don’t worry…it will probably just be some frozen blackberries to add to my Greek yogurt) and then to  try again later.

But be warned: Weight Loss Wednesday this week may turn into Tip-The-Scales Thursday instead.

Stay tuned…..

My husband struggles with numbers. I don’t mean in an “I hate math” kinda way. I mean he has a hard time remembering them.

Whip off a phone number verbally to him and he most likely won’t be able to recall it by the time he walks over to the phone to dial.

Sending him off with a child to be dropped at a friend’s house? Better write the house number down on a sticky note. If he tries to go from memory, our child just may wind up at a complete strangers.

Yes ma’am, he and numbers do not mix. So, he’s had to have a plan for dealing with them.

I too have a problem with numbers. No, I’m not talking about remembering them. I can still recite my best friend’s phone number from sixth grade.

I mean with those nasty, flashing numbers on the scale. They are what trip me up.

When at a point in my life where the numbers on the scale do indeed need to go down, I commence chasing. I mentally plug a number into my head and then set about reaching the magic digits…..

Oh yeah, and the most important point—reaching them by another number–a date on the calendar. What it might look like is this:

By May 30th (date of friends Memorial Day cookout) I am gonna weigh XXX.

By August 21st (date of my upcoming high school reunion) I will weigh XXX.

Or by November 25th (Thanksgiving) I’ll finally have all this weight off and weigh only a glorious XXX.

Oh, it is wonderful to set goals in life. However, I have found more often than not, when I set these “I will weigh ______ by ______” targets, and then don’t quite reach them, I am thrown into a complete tizzy. Even if I miss it a little, I mentally beat myself up and then promptly head for the nearest binge food and physically blow myself up.

Silly girl.

While the scale can be an indicator, I need to NOT make it my God. Way back last fall, I wrote this here on a Weight Loss Wednesday:

Define your week by obedience, not by a number on the scale.

The scale does help measure our progress, but it can’t tell us everything.

It can’t tell us if the problem was too much salt of late that is making us retain a pound or two of water that might not otherwise show up.

It can’t tell us if we actually lost a pound of fat but gained more muscle from weight training that wouldn’t show up as a total loss on the scale.

And, it can’t tell us what time of the month it is and then give us automatic credit for the extra two pounds or so that glorious few days brings to us.

So let’s stop.

Ask ourselves the following questions:

• Did I overeat this week on any day?
• Did I move more and exercise regularly?
• Do I feel lighter than I did at this time last Wednesday?
• Did I eat in secret our out of anger or frustration?
• Did I feel that, at any time, I ran to food instead of to God?
• BEFORE I HOPPED ON THE SCALE….did I think I’d had a successful, God-pleasing week?

If the answers to these are correct, I should be pleased. Why oh why do I get so tied up in a stupid number!!!!!! And why do I almost let it trip me up and send me to the kitchen for a 750 calorie binge?

Sweet bloggy friends, we need to define our journey by our obedience, not a number on the scale.

And we just might need to stop this “I’ll way____ by ______” nonsense and just get there…..whenever “there” happens to fall.

Can you relate?

Please hop on and let us know how you are doing with your weight loss journey.

I’m praying for you!

Sweet Blessings,

Hi all–

Man, I am feeling the crunch.

I have the biggest conference of my year coming up in two short weeks. Two messages to prepare. Book proposals to peruse. A speaker evaluation group of twelve ladies to pray for. And two days of training for our Proverbs 31 speaker team to head up.

I’m tired just thinking about it!

So, not a lot of time to write blog posts.

Ta-da! My sweet friend Lindsey Feldpausch to the rescue.

I’m actually having coffee this morning with Lindsey. She is back in Michigan for her sister-in-law’s wedding and so we get to hang out for a bit. Then, in two weeks, she & I, along with P31 sistah Whitney Capps, will be roomies at the She Speaks conference. What fun.

Well, in the mean time, I am going to be directing you to some of Lindsey’s WONDERFUL posts on all things healthy, godly & weightloss-y…….well, sort of.

She has such a fresh take on things.

A spiritual twist.

A God’s-girl view.

So, this week, for her clever post on the BMI index chart, click here. Don’t forget to come back and let us know how your week went!

Praying for you Weight Loss Wednesday gals!

Note: Those of you who read this as an email will need to hop over to www.karenehman.com to leave a comment.

Question.

So why would someone who has a feature on her blog called Weight Loss Wednesdays interview women who have cooking sites and sometimes feature recipes that are not “lite” or “low-fat” or “low-carb” or “low-anything” for that matter?

Seems a little culinary schizophrenic, right?

Good question….

One discovery I made on the way down the scale while losing 100 pounds (and one I am rediscovering  as I’m still attempting to get these last dozen or so pounds back off after regaining) is the concept of feast foods. Hang with me….

So many women lose weight (and lots of it, mind you) by cutting every and all “fattening” foods from their diet in extreme ways.

Some go low fat. Thus NO fat at all.

Some opt for no carbs. Bye-bye bread, pasta, rice, potatoes, sugars and starches.

Some choose the no sugar path. Hello meats and veggies and nuts, ….oh my!

Now, all of these diets will work.

If you stick to them.

For me, the problem is in the sticking.

And, when I stop sticking and wander even slightly off course, the forbidden food I sample then becomes a trigger food. For in my mind I surmise, “Shoot! I just ate XXXXX (fill in the forbidden food) and went off my ‘diet’. Might as well just eat some more of it (or another forbidden, but now oh-so-magnetic food like it). I blew it. I’ll stuff myself now and start over again tomorrow.

Been there sister? I have. Visited there just this weekend thanks to some full-fat brats, Heath Bar ice cream and some salt-and cracked pepper potato chips! YIKES!

The problem I see is two-fold.

First of all, it is hard for me to “get there” without a little fun food and incentive sprinkled in along the way. When I dropped the 100 pounds, I had dark chocolate everyday. Lately I have been in deprivation mode, sampling nothing that wasn’t a lean meat, a veggie or a poached egg.

Boring.

I just set myself up for a fall off the weight loss bandwagon.

Now, for those gals who can stick to it for the long haul eating only what is on the approved list for their diet, what happens when the weight is lost and the ‘diet’ is done? Do they continue to eat that way for the rest of their life? When the forbidden foods are added back in, will they too become trigger foods? Nearly everyone I’ve ever known who did an extreme diet to lose the weight regained it. Not all of them, but most of them.

So, here is the dealio and the reason I sometimes feature what seems to be fattening recipes here on this site.

It is okay to eat them.

Sometimes.

In moderation.

They are what I like to call “feast foods”.

In the Bible, there were several occasions where God called for a party. Usually about once a month. During those times, the people feasted. They ate fattening stuff. They had themselves an all-out Middle Eastern buffet-laden good time.

Then…… they went back to eating “their daily bread”.

(And by the way…..if carbs are so evil, then tell me, why did Jesus say He is the bread of life? He didn’t say “I am the broccoli of life” or “the tuna-fish of life”, now did He? Must be bread isn’t all that bad IF it is bread like they ate in Bible times, not the bleached, nutrient-stripped, white stuff that passes for ‘bread’ today. But, that is a post this whole wheat-grinding mama will tackle another day….)

We need to treat ‘feast foods’ as ‘feast foods’ and not eat them constantly. Sadly, most people today eat what I’d consider a feast food at nearly all 21 meals per week! Or we can invent celebrations for any reason as an excuse to stuff ourselves with feast foods.

“Oh…it is so-and-so’s graduation party. Better pig out.” (Even though there is a beautiful veggie tray and tons of fresh fruit)

“Oh, I just made cookies for the kids. I’ll just have one….two….seven…”

“I’m eating out and someone else is paying. I’m not gonna order a grilled chicken salad. Duh!!”

Our minds can turn any occasion into a reason for a feast food frenzie.

Maybe instead we should plan ahead and work just a few into our weekly eating. Say, stick to the healthy stuff in small portions all week except for Sunday when you are having company for dinner. Or Friday night when you and the hubster will farm the kiddos out to grandma and grandpa’s and head to your favorite restaurant.

And, don’t forget those little daily treats. A dark Hershey’s kiss has just 20 calories. Just make sure you are only eating a few as an afternoon snack.

Treat feast foods a rarities and don’t let them become trigger foods which send you spiraling down into depression and send the scale numbers climbing higher and higher…..

Okay now, leave a comment and let us know how your week went. Also, let us know your favorite feast food. Then, plan to eat some of it this week.

Careful now….I’m talking half a piece of cheesecake…..not half a cheesecake!

Feasting Blessings,

Welcome to all you who are here for our regular Weight Loss Wednesday little cyber group. If you’ve wandered by for any other reason, we’re still glad you’re here and today’s post certaily appplies to more than weight loss. By the way, if you’d like to join us on Wednesdays or catch up on the  what we are doing, click here to sample past posts and get started. We’d love to have you!

Last night I sat at my youngest son’s ball game. My mind was on the game. They were playing a team they needed to beat at least one of the two times we face them this week for the league championship. (We lost. One more chance on Thursday!) But my mind also went elsewhere as I hollered at one after another of our players after they hit the ball and began their jaunt to first base. It seems each time I shout the same phrase.

Our oldest, Mitch, running the bases in Rockford.

“Get there….get there…..GET THERE!!!!!!”

Now, that is not the only thing I yell during ballgames when either of my boys or their teammates are playing. I also holler when they are up to the plate. Things like “Give it a ride Parker!”, “Pick one and drive it, Blake!”, or “Base hit now J.D….Come on!”. Or when they are in the field or on pitchers mound you may hear me shout, “Come on Jackson! Fire it in there!” or “Stick with it Alex…you’ve got it…you’ve got it”

Yes…..my kids have often told me that when I am on the sidelines at their games, I suddenly transform into the mom from The Blind Side, hooting and a hollerin’.

I don’t know about that. However, one thing I do know, I made a decision 12 years ago when our oldest child played her very first sport, that I was never going to holler anything other than encouragement to her, her brothers or any of their teammates.

Never.

EVER!

Perhaps it had something to do with seeing so many kids’ spirits deflated when their parents belittled them on the field or court after a bad play.

“Come on! What were ya thinking? Use your brain!”, “No! Get your head in the game! You know better than that!”.

Or worse. Much, much worse.

It damages parent’s relationships with their kids and make this mama so stinkin’ angry.

But that’s another post for another day.

Well, last night I thought about the self-talk we mumble and shout in this journey of losing weight. I know for me many times I beat myself up emotionally and utter all sorts of deflating phrases to my brain.

My heart.

My soul.

“Oh come on!!! What am I doing? I can’t even lose 2 pounds in a week. What a failure.”

“I just have no self-control. None!”

“I am never gonna get this extra weight off. Why keep trying? It is a hopless cause.”

Ever been there?

Are you there now?

Well, let’s take a cue from my “encouragement only, shoutin’ self”

Stop with the negative already and shout only the positive. Tell yourself you can do it.

With God’s help. Then…….

“Get there…..get there….GET THERE!!!!”

Don’t look back. Look forward. Keep running, even if you stumble. Very seldom does a player crack one over the fence and then just sail around the bases to home plate. No. They sometimes only make it to first and then have to wait to go to second. Sometimes they are then thrown out at second and have to wait for their next at-bat to try again.

Mitch crossing the plate at home.

But eventually, with perseverance and determination, they get there and cross home plate.

Is it not that way with losing weight? We start off out of the chutes thinking we’ll make it all the way to our goal without a mis-step.

Ladies, that RARELY ever happens. And even when it does, so often once the goal is reached, some weight is put back on. (Ahem….why else am I hosting our little group here? I did just that!)

So let’s pinky promise that no matter the week we’ve had; whether the scales went down, stayed the same or spiked up….a lot. We will tell ourselves…

“GET THERE!” and keep running.

Okay?

Now, hop on and let us know how your week went. Also, do you struggle with this issue? What negative self-talk do you utter under your breath? We’re in this together, remember!

Getting-There Blessings,

Thanks to all of you who left comments on my last post about minding your own sin. The winner of the ESV Bible is:

Anita: Timestamp June 14th; 11:15 am

Send your home address to me at karen@proverbs31.org so I can ship it out to you!

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Well, since last October we have been meeting on Wednesdays to discuss and encourage each other in the areas of eating and exercise. (If you are new, you can click on Weight Loss Wednesdays in the sidebar to read the past posts)

Today will be a little bit different.

We are going to talk about an exercise. Dancing to be exact. But with a twist.

Dancing with our Heavenly Father.

The longer I journey on the road to health (and a healthy weight) the more I see the connection to my relationship with God.

When I am obedient and eating healthy, I feel close to Him.

When I am rebellious and eating junk, I don’t.

It is kind of like a dance. When I am being sensible and making good choices, I feel in sync with Him.

I love that feeling. Makes me wonder why I ever take the wrong road and break the dance with turning to food instead of to God.

Today, I want to introduce you to my friend and fellow Proverbs 31 speaker Susanne Sheppmann. She has just written a book that will help you to do grow your relationship with God which will result in many areas of your life getting better. This can include your eating/exercising habits. It is called Embraced by the Father.

Susanne is so kind to offer one of you not only a signed copy of her new book, but a $10.00 Starbucks card to go along with it. If you want to take a peek at the book’s trailer, here it is along with a short interview with Susanne.

* Susanne, tell us a little about what life is like at your house this summer.

Karen, I am having a delightful summer.  I just had my four-year-old granddaughter for an entire week.  Fun stuff—great memories!  Now I am relaxing and catching up on some leisure reading which is my favorite thing in the world to do.  And I am looking forward to the Proverbs 31 She Speaks conference.  Every year it is a highlight of my summer.

*What prompted you to write Embraced by the Father?

My book, Embraced by the Father: Finding Grace in the Names of God is somewhat of a memoir and a Bible study.  I have always been intrigued by the various names of God such as El Roi—the God Who See Me and Jehovah Nissi—the Lord is my Banner.  What I have discovered over my journey as a Christ follower’s is that the names of God reflect His character and power in my personal life.  I enjoyed writing Embraced in a dance metaphor because God is my dance partner for eternity.

*Why is it important for women to have strong connection to the Heavenly Father?

My relationship with my biological father was anything but loving.  Learning to experience my relationship with God as my Father has been a long and tumultuous road.  It has been difficult to believe that the Lord is my “perfect daddy.”  But, He has proved himself faithful and worthy of my trust.  I pray every woman will know the love of God as her Abba—Daddy.  I know that as women learn to trust the heavenly Father it helps to enhance our spiritual walk and our personal relationships with others.

*How are the names of God important to you?

The names of God are important to know and understand.  Through the various names He reveals the perfection of His character and personality.  These terms enable us to experience the Lord in a more intimate and personal relationship.

*How do you hope women are different after reading your book?

I pray that every woman who reads Embraced by the Father comes away with a deeper understanding of God’s power and sovereignty in her life.  I want the readers to that know that no matter how hard becomes (and life is hard) that God is always there as your dance partner.  He wants lead your through the joys and sorrows of this life.  God desires to be your dance partner on the dance floor of life.

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Okay gals, I hope that encourages you today!

Please hop on and leave a comment. You regulars (and newcomers!) let us know how your week went and how we can be praying for you. Any visitors who would just like to be entered in the giveaway, simply say “I’m in!”. The winner will be announced tomorrow–when we have yet another giveaway–especially for dads!

See you then!

NOTE: Congrats to Brandie (comment left June 7 at 9:25 pm) You are the winner of  The Mailbox by Marybeth Whalen. Send your mailing address to me at  karen@proverbs31.org. Happy summer reading

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Welcome Weight Loss Wednesday gals!

I am linking today for our encouragement over to my friend (and new blogger) Lindsey Feldpausch. Many of you will recognize her from the couple of times she has guest posted for me. Well, she now has her own blog called Redefining Health and it is AWESOME!!!

Now, I am not just being nice since she is my friend. I LOVE reading Lindsey’s writings. Words just fall out of her mouth and arrange themselves on the page in a most interesting, clever and convicting way. While I know she considers me a mentor, I am mentored by her perhaps even more.  I so loved her recent post called The Scale that I am linking us over there today.

However, be sure to click your back arrow and return here to check in with us for the week. We want to know how your week went, any successes or less-than-stellar moments, and how we can pray for you this week.

For now, click here for Lindsey’s post, then come back to check in.

Sweet Blessings,

Congrats to Amy V. (comment left May 27th at 4:16 pm). You are the winner of the friendship basket giveaway featuring two copies of Lisa Welchel’s new book. Send me your address at karen @proverbs31.org so I can get your goodies out to you right away!

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Hi Wednesday Weight Loss gals! Please check in as usual today, We love hearing how you are doing and knowing how to pray for you too. And please enjoy this guest interview with my friend Arlene Pellicane from www.LosingWeightAfterBaby.com. She and I met at a Hearts at Home event in California a few years back. She has an awesome ministry that encourages new moms in specific, but is also chock-full of info all women trying to lose weight can relate to. Enjoy! (And check out today’s giveaway!)

An energetic speaker and writer, Arlene Pellicane has been featured on The Hour of Power, The 700 Club, and Turning Point with Dr. David Jeremiah.  She created a website www.LosingWeightAfterBaby.com to encourage moms with podcasts, videos, articles, eBooks, and the audiobook, Losing Weight After Baby: 31 Days to a New You.

Before becoming a stay-at-home mom, Arlene worked as the Associate Producer for Turning Point Television with Dr. David Jeremiah.  She has also been an on-air features producer for The 700 Club.  Arlene earned her BA in Intercultural Studies and Communication from Biola University and her Masters in Journalism from Regent University.  She loves speaking to women at moms groups, seminars, and retreats.  Arlene lives in San Diego with her husband James and three children, Ethan, Noelle, and Lucy.

You have a ministry designed for women who need to lose weight after giving birth, tell us how you got started in it?

I found myself in my mid-thirties, pregnant 5 times in a span of 6 years, so I had a lot of firsthand experience with gaining and losing baby pounds!  Two of my pregnancies ended in miscarriage but they still involved gaining and losing weight.  I noticed so many moms around me were discouraged and hopeless about ever shedding those last 10 (or so…) pounds.  I wanted to develop something to help them recapture that hope and make healthy choices for themselves and ultimately for their children.

Why is losing weight after a baby so hard for many moms?

First, you feel entitled to eat.  You’ve been caring for one or more kids all day, so it’s easy to turn to food for comfort and a pick-me-up.  Next, you are pressed for time so you don’t plan your meals or exercise.  That’s why so many moms end up in the drive thru which is a killer for losing weight.  Then you look around and see that most of the moms you know haven’t lost their weight either.  It’s easier to go with the flow then put out the effort it takes to lose the weight.

Arlene's newest-sweet Lucy at 3 months

Being a mom is a huge job in and of itself. How can women carve time out to take care of themselves when they are so focused on taking care of their child or children?

That’s a great question because many moms get stuck here.  We are “mom martyrs,” doing everything for everyone else and thinking that is so noble.  Being worn out as a mom doesn’t serve anyone.  When you take time for yourself to exercise, you will be a better mom for your kids.  You can exercise out of your home.  For instance, I bought a used spin bike on Craigslist.  I pump up the music and ride while my 5 & 3 year old run around the house and go crazy.  They call it “exercise time!” and they love it.  Learn to incorporate exercise into your family’s schedule and/or have times when the kids are watched and you work out maybe 1 or 2 times a week.  In terms of food, when you make wise choices for yourself (an apple instead of a bag of chips), your kids will follow suit and that’s good for them.

What are some important facts for moms to remind themselves of in their quest to drop post-baby weight?

Nine months on, nine months off.  Don’t get frustrated if it doesn’t all just fall off with nursing.  Keep eating healthy and exercising until you reach your goal.  Set small doable goals (lose 3 pounds this month) and long term goals (back to pre-pregnancy weight in 9 months).  Losing weight is simple – mathematical really – to lose one pound a week, you’ve got to cut 3500 calories out.  That’s 500 calories a day that you have to exercise away or skip eating.  So losing weight is simple; but it’s not easy.  It takes a lot of diligence and perseverance.  Which is actually a selling point, because as you’re working on your waistline, you’re also working on self-control which is essential to mature as a Christian.

Any words of advice or encouragement for all women out there trying to reach or maintain a healthy weight?

Take small incremental steps and then celebrate your victories.  If you love soda, try to skip 1 soda a week.  And then the next week, skip 2 and so on.  Make small incremental changes that you can live with.  Meditate on meaningful Scriptures about dedicating your body to the Lord like Romans 12:1-2.  Rehearse positive affirmations in your mind like “I am a healthy person and my best days are ahead of me.”  Make losing weight as fun as possible by exercising with friends, having a biggest loser contest, and rewarding yourself for pounds lost (my rewards are massages from my husband).  You can do it mom!

Now for the giveaway!

One of you will win her audiobook, Losing Weight After Baby: 31 Days to a New You. For 31 days, you will receive a 5 minute audio message from Arlene in your email box to encourage you for the day.  Daily action steps will give you direction and Arlene’s friendly style will keep you motivated and upbeat.  All you have to do is listen for 5 minutes at your convenience on your computer, iPod or MP3 player!

More details about this wonderful feature can be found here: http://www.losingweightafterbaby.com/product_details.php?id=24

Okay gals, leave a comment checking in for the week or on a topic Arlene touched on above. You’ll be entered in the random drawing.

Have a wonderful week!