ANNOUNCEMENT: Each day next week will be a different Valentine giveaway—–marriage books, Bath and Body Works products, Valentines goodies and more. Mark your calendar and ‘click’ in!
Have you joined us today by way of the Encouragement for Today devotion I have up over at Crosswalk.com and on our site at Proverbs 31.org? If so, welcome!
PLEASE NOTE: If you haven’t read the devotion yet, you’ll be lost when reading this post so click here to read it. Don’t forget to come back and enter the giveaway!
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My husband Todd and I are mismatched.
He is laid back.
I am high-strung.
He is energized by lots of alone time.
I am energized by being with people.
He loves smooth jazz stations.
I prefer talk radio.
He is “get to the point” already!
I am “tell all the details so it makes a great story”.
He is a simple ham sandwich with a pickle spear and side of chips.
I am a colorful grilled chicken salad with yellow mild pepper rings and snow white feta cheese and crimson dried cranberries with a splash of raspberry vinaigrette dressing and a sunny lemon-poppy seed muffin.
We are just not at all alike.
And it makes for a FABULOUS marriage.
No. Really.
Just like the candlesticks I described in the above devotion, we make a perfect pair.
Even though I am sure a compatibility test would NEVER couple Todd and I together, we are committed to making our mismatched marriage work.
Sometimes I wonder how we ever got married, being that we are so different. However, the old saying is true. Opposites do attract.
And then, they attack!
Living 24/7 with someone who does things so differently than you, who reacts in ways you wouldn’t or who thinks issues are so vital that you think are relative non-issues, well…it is just a set up for disaster!
Nearly 24 years of marriage has taught us that we are NEVER going to agree on every major parenting dilemma; or the proper way to stack the dishes; or which brand of toilet paper to buy. That is BEFORE we argue about which way it should go on the roll. (And people….can I just say, arguing about which way the toilet paper goes on the roll is just plain silly. After all, anyone with any sense knows that the paper should hang off of the FRONT of the roll! 
)
Let’s face it, living with another person, even one you are crazy in love with, is sometimes rocky and rough.
So let me tell you the one aspect of my mismatched marriage that I love.
It keeps me on my knees.
You see, if I had a perfect husband who could meet my every need, I would have no need for God.
And if he had a flawless wife who never yelled or nagged (not that I ever do those things!), he would have no need for a savior.
So that, dear cyber sister, is why I am thankful I have a husband who drives me nuts (and he, a wife who drives him even nutty-er!)
Because….it drives us both straight to Jesus.
For those of you who too are in a mismatched marriage, I have a little giveaway that may help you. It is pictured here (along with our mismatched candlesticks!)
It is a couples “basket-in-a-box” centered around my friends’ Bill and Pam Farrel’s book Men Are Like Waffles,Women Are Like Spaghetti; Understanding and Delighting in Your Differences.
In the Farrel’s words:
Why is communication with the opposite gender so difficult? Because Men are like Waffles, and Women are Like Spaghetti!
Men process life in boxes. If you look down at a waffle, you see a collection of boxes separated by walls. That is typically how a man processes life. Our thinking is divided up into boxes that have room for one issue and one issue only. The first issue of life goes in the first box, the second goes in the second box and so on. The typical man then spends time in one box at a time and one box only. When a man is at work, he is at work. When he is in the garage tinkering around, he is in the garage tinkering. When he is watching TV, he is WATCHING TV! Social scientists call this “compartmentalizing”.
In contrast to men’s waffle like approach, women process life more like a plate of spaghetti. If you look at a plate of spaghetti, you notice that there are individual noodles that all touch one another. If you attempted to follow one noodle around the plate, you would intersect a lot of other noodles and you might even switch to another noodle seamlessly. That is how women face life. This is why women are typically better at multi-tasking than men. She can talk on the phone, prepare a meal, make a shopping list, work on the planning for tomorrow’s business meeting, give instructions to her children as they are going out to play and close the door with her foot without skipping a beat!
This is just a sampling of some of the helpful marital info you’ll find in this fabulous book!
To round out this marriage giveaway, here is what else is included:
- For her, some Irresistible Apple Bath and Body Works Lotion. (Eve tempted Adam to evil with an apple. Maybe you can tempt your husband in a good way with this apple lotion. Are you trackin’ with me ladies?)
- For him, some C.O. Bigelow’s Bay Rum After Shave Lotion (Most after shave makes me sneeze. This one makes me want to ask Todd if he’s in the mood for a little “horizontal fellowship”
)
- Does he drive you nuts? Enjoy some Hershey’s Dark Chocolate Almonds!
- He thinks you are a complete and total fruit? Feed each other some Dark Chocolate-Covered Pomegranate Pieces! (So much better than grapes!)
- Are the two of you as different as salty, snappy pretzels and smooth, sweet peanut butter? Well, those two tastes, just like you two, blend beautifully in a bag of H.K. Anderson Peanut Butter Filled Nuggets.
Okay, hop on and comment. I want you to tell one aspect of your husband’s personality that you appreciate. One gal who comments will win the couples giveaway centered around the Farrel’s helpful book! I’ll leave this post up through the weekend and the winner will be announced Monday.
I’ll go first.
I adore my husband’s calm, cool, collected, “I refuse to panic” personality.
I can freak out in a split second. He just doesn’t worry, fret or stress. His faith in God is cemented firm. In fact, when Kenz was stranded all alone in a winter storm in NC last Friday (post here), I was busy planning her funeral as I frantically talked out-loud to him, just after we’d crawled in bed after talking to a very distressed Kenz. Within a few minutes of my jaws flappin’, he was soundly snoring in the bed next to me. No joke!!!
Now, what do you appreciate about your husband?
Mismatched Blessings,
I met the author of this fabulous resource many years ago when we both spoke at a Hearts at Home moms conference. As a busy mom with two small children and a baby on the way, I heard her speak of “quantity cooking”; putting up several main dish, side dish and even desserts in the freezer to take out and enjoy on those crazy, busy days.
