Friendship Basket Giveaway and Chat with Lisa Whelchel
Tuesday morning update: Due to the busy holiday weekend, I’ve decided to leave this post up throughout today to give more gals a chance to comment and enter. The winner will be announced tomorrow morning. Have a great day!
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In the late 1970’s and early 1980’s, I was an average Michigan gal navigating the fun and sometimes stormy friendships of junior and senior high school.
Meanwhile, way out west in California, another gal my age was acting for television, living a life I, like many of my friends, could only dream of.
I spent many evenings watching her on TV, secretly wishing I had a group of friends like she had.
Tootie…. Natalie….. Jo…. They seemed to have it all together. Any problems that did arise between these faithful friends were all solved within the short span of half an hour.
Little did I know that in real life, this beautiful teenage girl was missing out on many aspects of what real-life friendships were all about.
Lisa Whelchel (aka Blair Warner on the hit TV series The Facts of Life) admits she has had to learn about friendship a little late in the game. Now a sought-after author and speaker, (and someone I consider a sweet friend and godly role model to my daughter Kenzie), Lisa has just released her latest book Friendship for Grown-Ups; What I Missed and Learned Along the Way.
Growing up as an actress in Hollywood, there were few people Lisa could trust, and even fewer to guide her. By the time she reached adulthood, she had learned to be self-sufficient. She was strong, she was “safe,”
And she was lonely.
One day, Lisa found that the “the desire to experience connection was stronger than the desire to be safe.” She determined right then to finally understand friendship: how to create one, sustain it, and experience the sheer joy of having it. But it wasn’t easy. This book chronicles her quest and contains many practical ideas for connecting with friends on a more-than-surface level.
Lisa and I carved out time to connect this week for a little chat about her new book. Enjoy this honest interview and then be sure to leave a comment below. One winner will be chosen to receive an awesome friendship basket-in-a-box giveaway. Details below. For now, here’s Lisa:
What first prompted you to write a book on friendship?
Like most of my books, this one came out of a failure in my life. I’d been doing things the wrong way and God taught me, through a recent journey, so many important lessons on friendship. Anytime we go through a difficult time, we should look for ways to help others with what we’ve learned. I want people to know that friendships don’t have to be painful. They can also be life-giving. I want those who have been hurt to know truths that can be transforming in this area.
The subtitle of your book says “What I missed and learned along the way” What is the most important lesson you missed?
That vulnerability pulls people together, not perfection.
What is the most important lesson you learned?
I learned how to identify safe friends.
What do you hope readers gain from reading this book?
I hope they will allow the desire for connection to surface. It is there when we are younger, but often we feel as grown-ups that it is simply not worth it. This may be due to the pain or rejection we’ve experienced. So we suppress that desire and instead settle for shallow relationships. However, deep inside we are still longing for intimate connection. I hope they will allow that God-given desire to surface. He promises to meet us as we do.
Now for the giveaway! Lisa has graciously donated two signed copies of her new book for this friendship-basket-in-a-box. It includes:
- Two signed copies of Friendship for Grown-Ups. One is for you; one is for you to give to a friend.
- A $10 Starbucks card so you can meet a nearby friend for coffee.
- And a set of colorful note cards so you can drop an encouraging line or two to a faraway friend.
Okay everyone, leave a comment on any aspect of friendship to be entered in the random drawing.
Tell us what lesson you’ve learned about friendship.What do you think makes a good friend? How do you wish you were a better friend? Or tell us about your best friend from your childhood or the current one you have now.
Or, if you can’t think of a comment on friendship, then simply leave one wishing Lisa a Happy Birthday. On Saturday she turns…….XX. (Come on now. You didn’t think a true friend would give away her sista’s age, did you? :-))
I’ll leave this post up throughout the entire holiday weekend and the winner will be announced on Tuesday. If you’d like to purchase a copy of this fabulous book (My favorite so far of Lisa’s) click here. She’ll sign and personalize the book to whomever you wish. She’s also offering a girlfriend’s package with two books at a wonderfully reduced rate.
Well, I’m off to spend some time with my new friends from Summit Homeschool Sports Club as we cheer our boys on at the varsity baseball national championship! I’ll try to Twitter and update my status on Facebook throughout the tournament this weekend.
See you next week!
I would love to read Lisa’s book. Recently, I listened to her interview on the Today Show, Life Today, and now her interview with Karen. I also heard Lisa speak last year in St. Louis at Women of Faith. A piece of advice, given by Lisa during one of the interviews really stuck with me. We need to simply watch how a woman treats her friends; that is most likely how she would treat us as a friend. Very simply but profound.
Friendship occur at various levels. A soul mate type of friendship is rare. We really need good Christian friendships. I’m glad Lisa wrote such a book.
Happy Birthday Lisa! And thank you Karen! I would love to read this book. My very best friend and I have such a hard time fitting in any girl time. I would love some creative ideas on how to nurture our friendship.
I have struggled with true friends for many years. Ive made lots of excuses on why I dont have close meaningful friendships with women, tired of excuses and cant wait to read the book!
Yes – friends can be a wonderful blessing; and much missed when you don’t have them. I guess that is all I will/can say today. If I tell my story, it will get me all emotional, and then I won’t be able to fulfill my evening duties. Happy Birthday, Lisa. I have your book, “Creative Correction,” and love it. :)
I have longed for some really good Christian friends for a long time. I prayed and prayed God would guide me into the path of some Godly women. About two years ago I heard about a community bible study group in my home town. Wow, it has been a blessing from God!!! I do find myself getting scared of getting hurt and trying to step backwards, but I know that is the devil so I press myself in and keep loving my sisters in Christ! I know I would benefit greatly from Lisa’s book!
Happy Birthday Lisa!!
In the last 6 months in the midst of the toughest days in my life, in the midst of separation from my husband and now praying for reconcilliation and not divorce – I have discovered what real friends are.
The kind who answer when you call at 2am because you are can’t sleep and need to talk. The kind who know your spouses wrongdoings and rather than say to you, “you can do better” or “God wants you happy” tell you to keep praying and seeking Jesus and he can restore your marraige and bring your prodigal home. True friends are the ones who call you out when you sin and aren’t afraid or hurt by your words of denial or anger back at them. True friends keep on praying, keep on calling to check up, and never ever tell you there isn’t hope for anything. Because true friends – the good safe friends – they are seeking Christ first and in everything – including in how they deal with you.
Happy Birthday Lisa!
This is an area I struggle with-true friendship and keeping lasting friendship; needless to say, I would LOVE to win this book! It’s so hard for me to let others see the “real” me. Lisa’s words that “vulnerability pulls people together, not perfection” really, really hit me-like God gave me a wake up call!
I can identify with what so many other women have commented on that it’s actually quite a relief to know others feel similarly to me! ****Jen O- I’m like you-totally get it!
Happy birthday Lisa! :)
~Amy
This is such an awesome giveaway! I think the thing that I am constantly learning about friendship is the accept my friends “where they are at”!
Hmmm … my good friend Susan lives across the street. We first got together when my daughter and the granddaughter she kept could play together. At the time I didn’t know that God was answering my prayer for a Godly female friend, but He did! Now we visit often and try to arrange weekly playdates for our ‘kids.’ I love having a good friend so close!
I have such a hard time making friends–true friends, not just acquaintances. I know I, for one, feel like my life is so different from other women’s lives, when in reality, it’s probably not as different as I think!! I am very good at isolating myself, and have built a lot of emotional walls over the years, for fear that if other women really get to know me, they will think I’m weird or crazy. I don’t judge other women by that measure, but I certainly do judge myself that way. I really need to read this book, even if I don’t win the giveaway. Thank you for the interview, and happy birthday to Lisa!!! :)
Happy Birthday Lisa!! I’m sure your family will give you a big celebration. I grew up watching you on Facts of Life (my favorite show at the time) and have enjoyed “connecting” with you over the years. It sure was fun following your family’s dream trip a few years back.
I have found friendship a difficult things through the years. My husband and 6 kids keep me very busy and friendship takes time. But I still long for the day in day out connection with a true friend. I have a friend who is like a sister but her life is also very busy, so we don’t connect on a daily basis like I desire. I am excited that Lisa wrote this book and I can’t wait to read it.
I’ve lost touch with so many friends; close friendships seem so hard to keep.
The best friend I had growing up and I don’t really communicate anymore, although I pray for her and miss her so much. Our lives grew apart and even the 30 years of friendship we had couldnt sustain it. I’ve been longing for a true close friend and recently over the past several months, I have gotten to know a girl at church. Our kids are the same ages and get along great. My unsociable hubby even gets along with her no social skills hubby. We both feel like God has brought us together and are taking this friendship slowly, but I am so glad He did.
Happy “Birth”day Lisa!!!
The older we get the more we learn that our “true” friends are like gold. I indeed have the bestest BFF. We worked together for years….she named my two daughters for me….and as I was expecting I was sick…once when we went to lunch together it was pouring rain outside…we were laughing because I was having a hard time driving my husbands stick shift truck…well I lost my lunch and so did she…today we still laugh about that day! God truly loves me…not only did his only begotten son die for me…. but he gave me a golden best friend to share this journey called life with. I love you Robin
My best friend and I have the type of relationship where we can go for months and pick up as if it has only been hours. We are as different as night and day but go togetherlike peas and carrots.
Happy Birthday Lisa!
Blessings
I could write pages on this subject, but won’t ; ) We need friends…irons sharpens iron. I have recently made a huge move and I’m 40 something. Funny to say, but Facebook has kept me sane dring this season of my life, because it has kept me connected to my friends.
The Word says…a friend loves at all times. However, that doesn’t mean I might not “like” something a friend says or does, but I will still love her.
Happy Birthday Lisa!
(I’m the Shelley that reviewed one of your books a few yrs ago and my quote is in your book.)
I used to have a best friend. We spent a lot of time together. The best thing was she could make me laugh like no one else. After my husband died, our friendship changed and eventually it came to an end. But where the relationship went after my husband died was not good for me, and so the relationship had to end. I miss her a lot. No one has been able to fill her shoes in my life. Anyway, I’m thinking I should send her this book and read it myself. Who knows what may happen?
I think friendship is never-ceasing. Never-ceasing due to living far apart or going through a life-changing event. True friends always stick together, and love you no matter what! :)
I learned this from Elizabeth George’s “Life Management for Busy Women”:
-true friends- understand and support your commitments and your responsibilities and your priorities ( and your busy life).”
A true friend is someone you can be your total, true self around. Someone who doesn’t make you question their motives or intentions.
I have many dear friends…childhood, school chums, cousins, colleagues, and church sisters…but not that best friend, buddy, pal-o-mine. I’m content and feel blessed, but I also wonder if I’m missing out on something special.
Happy Birthday, Lisa!
oops – forgot to leave my name & stuff. That’s me above. ~ Bethany
I need this book because it seems like something always happens to my best friendships. Occasionally I know what it is. Most of the time I don’t. I try to keep my word and be there for my friends, but I get frustrated when they don’t do the same for me. I’m in that spot yet once again. I just want to cry when I think about this particular friend, who I thought was above the petty stuff. Guess not!
I’ve been a Lisa Welchel fan for years. Happy Birthday, Lisa!!!
In Junior and senior high school I didn’t really have any friends. I was made fun of most of the time because I was visually impaired. I had no one to go to, no one to lean on, and no one for support.
Last year after getting email I received an email from a friend who I’ve known since I was 13. She was actually my camp counselor and we always kept in touch. After reading her email I realized that I always had a friend who I could have gone to if I had only thought about it. She is almost twenty years older than me so she most likely would have been able to give me great advice with the problems I had growing up or at least she would have been someone I could have leaned on for encouragement and love. I ended up telling her all the hurt and pain I had gone through in my life and she was right there listening and helping me through it all. Last April our simple friendship became a mother and daughter relationship. She has told me that nothing I do or tell her will ever diminish her love for me and devotion to me. She is certainly a friend who loves at all times.
Happy Birthday Lisa! I have lots of friends and even have one that I would call my best friend, but I haven’t found one that I was intimately connected to. I’m very open and outgoing, but I haven’t really found anyone who can be that way with me. But, I really do feel satisfied with my friendship. I was many years without any so they are very important to me now. I meet with a couple different ones every week and have others that are more occasional. Thanks for your work. I’m looking forward to reading the new book.