31 Days to Great Sex by Sheila Gregoire
NOTE: The blog tour for my new book LET. IT. GO. continues over at my two of my friend’s places: Shannon Milholland and Rachel Wojnarowski. And click here for the dozens of others on the tour.
Iโm addicted to Diet Pepsi. I donโt drink a lot of it: usually only a
can a day, and I make myself wait until 11:30 before popping it open.
But that urge hits me by 10:45.
I turn to Diet Pepsi because Iโm not a coffee person. Nevertheless,
Iโm a big fan of caffeine. And so I drink Diet Pepsi, knowing that
caffeine and aspartame are bad for me, because I figure the pick me up
outweighs the potential dangers.
I know what I need to do: I need to sleep more so I donโt need the
caffeine. That, however, requires effort. And so I turn to the quick
fix.
How often do we do that in our marriage?
When we need to lose weight we watch what we eat. We stop eating out
so much and start cooking healthy foods. We exercise. And we know it
will take time.
If we want a new job, we go back to school. We take extra training. We
work hard at our courses. We know that will take time, too.
But when our marriage is blah, what do we do? Often we take the Diet
Pepsi approachโwe have this need for intimacy and connection and fun
that we should meet through our marriage. When that doesnโt happen, we
throw ourselves into something else, like hobbies, or homemaking, or
church activities, or our kids. We take the easy way out.
Rather than putting the huge amount of work in to fixing our
marriage, we turn to something else instead.
Perhaps itโs because itโs not always obvious what work we should do.
How do you get yourself to magically connect? How do you heal weeks
and months and years of holding things back, of feeling disconnected,
of feeling hurt?
It isnโt easy. But I know that God wants more for my body than Diet
Pepsi, and that means that I have to do the hard thing of actually
quitting. And I believe that God wants more for our marriages
than to be merely existing, merely roommates, merely people who walk
through life together, but who donโt necessarily feel that rapturous
intimacy He promised.
Think about this: if marriage is supposed to reflect the deep intimacy
that God feels with us, then shouldnโt marriage be a beautiful thing?
And that intimacy that God designed us for within marriage has, at its
core, sex, even if we don’t always talk about it very much. Sex itself
is also supposed to reflect that urge to know and be known. Yet too
often sex becomes an obligation, something that we do because we know
we have to, but not something that we do because it helps us feel
invigorated, alive, or even loved.
I think God wants more for us than that. He doesnโt want sex to be an
obligation; He wants it to be a celebration! And while sex wonโt solve
all the problems in our marriages, it does lay a foundation of
connecting physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Itโs how we
become one flesh.
And sex wasn’t just designed to make you feel physically rapturous; it
also makes us feel intimate with our husbands. It makes us feel close.
It makes us laugh. It even helps us to sleep better!
Perhaps itโs time, then, for us to do the hard workโthat work that
really does pay off. And I have a really fun way for you to do it in
my new ebook The 31 Days to Great Sex. You work through it with
your husband, but donโt worry; itโs not like everyday is about a new
trick to do in bed. Not at all! Instead, itโs a journey of
communication you take together to help you, step by step, feel more
intimate both inside the bedroom and outside of it.
So if you’re just too exhausted for sex; if you’re sick of him
pestering you; if you can’t figure out what all the fuss is about;
take a deep breath and tell yourself: I may not understand how great
sex is right now, but I know that God meant for it to be great. And
I’m not going to stop until I figure out how that’s actually possible!
Because it is, ladies. Don’t lose out on it.
Billions of people have had sex. Iโm not sure how many have actually
made love. I hope through this 31 Days to show people how amazing–physically,
emotionally, and spiritually–making love can be.
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To be entered to win a copy of Sheila’s book, leave a simple comment here telling us one thing you love about your husband. I love my husband’s selfless attitude and gorgeous green eyes!
Sheila
Wray Gregoire is a national speaker, parenting columnist, and the
author of seven books, including The Good Girl’s Guide to Great Sex. Her passion is
to see marriages thrive, so that our churches and communities can
become stronger Christian witnesses. You can find Sheila, and her new
ebook The 31 Days to Great Sex, at her To Love, Honor
and Vacuum blog.
You have struck the right book for me maybe. Im in my menopause years. Im on antidepressants Sex has not worked for me for years. Only once in a blue moon does my brain work in that direction. I need help desperately My husband still wants sex but it has been painful or my mind just does not even think sex HELP LADIES what can I do to awaken my brain
I love my husband’s passion for serving the Lord.
I love my husband’s tender heart :)
My husband has an amazing psychology with our children. He is the most patient man with them and with me.
I love how my husband interacts with our daughter.
I love the way that my husband can still look at me from across the room and still give me butterflies in my stomach after all these years and we’ve been married for 16 1/2 years! He is also a wonderful cook and a great dad.
I need help in this area. My husband is in his early 80’s, I am in my late 70’s. We need to know how to connect more. This book sounds like it could help.
We both love each other but……..I need help~
My husband is very wise. He can go through any challenge or conflict and ALWAYS know exactly what to do!
I love my husbands beautiful blue eyes, his laugh and that he provides for our family.
He takes care of the “essentials”
I love:
*how hard my husband works to provide for our family
*how he takes time to PLAY and have fun
*how I feel when he gives me that look :-)
*how he hugs me tight
*how he appreciates our extended family
And…yes, his bum in the right pants
I love how selfless my husband is, how he loves me unconditionally and how he is such a great father!
I love my husband’s blue eyes and the fact that he is such an amazing, involved father! My daughter considers herself a “Daddy’s Girl” because they have such a great bond, and he is also so supportive, involved, and helpful with our son, who has autism… He is truly a gift from God!!!!
I love my husband’s blue eyes and the fact that he is such an amazing, involved father! My daughter considers herself a “Daddy’s Girl” because they have such a great bond, and he is also so supportive, involved, and helpful with our son, who has autism… He is truly a gift from God!!!!
I love that my husband is so talented. He can do so many things.
I love that my husband willingly helps with the children and housework, even after a long day of a full and a part-time job. I love that he sacrificially works that part-time job so that I can be at home with my children.
I love my husband because of everything he is, everything he is to me and everything he is to our sons. I love that he still kisses me 100 times a day and tells me he loves me even more then that!! I love that he accepted my two sons like his own 7 years ago and he is there real ‘daddy’. I love that he helps me with our handicap son that is autistic, totally deaf and has mild cerebal palsy. I love that he is protective of me and our children. I love that when I got injured and became disabled 5 years ago he didn’t walk out on me. I love that he has stuck with me though thick and thin. I love that he’s concerned about me because I’m in severe pain all the time and that he’s afraid he’ll hurt me when we make love or have sex; but I mess the intimancy and his touch (outside of his hugs and kisses) and I know he does too. I’m afraid one day will come that he’ll leave because we don’t have that anymore. I try to tell him I long for it and all he says is he’s afraid he’ll hurt me and he loves me. How do I get him past his fears of hurting me? I’ve already told him I’m in pain all the time anyway so it wouldn’t make a difference. I love my husband.
We just celebrated our 30th wedding anniversary yesterday and I love how faithful and committed to me and our marriage my husband is. He always puts my needs first, treats me like a queen and helps set a great example to our children of what a marriage should be. Thanks for the opportunity to win this book!
I’m not married yet, but I love the many ways that my fiancรฉ already protects me and shows that he will always do all that he can to provide for me (& one day for our family). I love that His heart desires to follow The Lord is everything. We understand that marriage will have its ups and downs, but we don’t want to get in the same rut that so many married couples do. We want to work each day to make our love grow and to keep our marriage fun & exciting.
I love that he puts up with me when I’m emotional!
I love the way he loves me even when I’m not so lovable–just like Jesus does.
I love my husband’s sense of humor and his smile!
I love that after 5 years together (which I know isn’t as long as many many other couples) he can still make me laugh. He’s the very first man to EVER be able to do that and it means so much to me.
And btw, I’m slightly addicted to Diet Pepsi as well. I try to tell myself it’s ok because there are worse things I could be addicted to. ;)
I am blessed with such an amazing husband! He is the love of my life also my best friend, I thank God everyday for giving him to me!
I love the my husband because when we dated all I had to do was want a diet coke and he would drive wherever to get me one, no matter what time it was. We have been married 20 years and he still would.