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10 Ways to Love Your Sandpaper Spouse

UPDATE: The winner of LET. IT. GO. is Lesley. Please send your home address, along with what it is you won, to [email protected] so we can get our book out to you.

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Sandpaper SPouses. A Proverbs 31 devotion from Karen Ehman (karenehman.com)

Welcome to you joining by finding your way here from my Proverbs 31 Ministries devotion today called Sandpaper Spouses {To read it, click here but be sure to come back for the free PDF and giveaway!}

As promised in the devotion, here is a free PDF that I created called: 10 Ways to Love Your Sandpaper Spouse. Enter your email address below and you will receive the free download in your inbox.

FREE PDF! 10 Ways to Love Your Sandpaper Spouse from karenehman.com


To be entered to win a copy of my book LET. IT. GO.: How to Stop Running the Show and Start Walking in Faithleave a comment here telling us which idea from the PDF you might want to try. Or, tell us one thing you appreciate about your spouse.

I’ll go first……my husband consistently makes sure that there is gas in my vehicle. I don’t think I have pumped gas more than a dozen times in the nearly 30 years we’ve been married, unless I was on a trip without him.

Okay….leave your comment, enjoy your free PDF, and go love that sandpaper spouse!


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  1. My husband and I are like night and day. We were both too young when we got married and haven’t yet found ourselves let alone someone else. I feel we have grown in two different directions and I don’t know how to connect. But I will say he is a great father, he has always been there for our children even in the not so easy times and I love that about him. Maybe that is where I can start, who knows.

  2. I love the idea of #10 Pray and say by setting an alarm to remind you during the day to pray for your husband and texting it to him. Sometimes we get caught up so much in our daily chores/work during the day, we often keep thoughts of our husband on the back burner. Nothing wrong with having a reminder!

  3. Sandpaper spouses is exactly how you’d describe my husband and myself! It was great to hear about the positive that can come from it if we respond properly and go to God. Thanks so much!
    P.s. I’d ask about a favorite childhood toy/game and find it online.

  4. My husband accepts me as I am. With all my many flaws. And since I was a child I never felt accepted in my home by either my mom or my dad. I always felt like I fell short. I’ve been praying that I can be a better wife. And we’ll be celebrating 40 years this summer. It’s never too late to improve.

  5. My husband is a great cook and often makes breakfast for me and for our kids. He always makes sure that I have first dibs with food, or gives me extra, while sacrificing his desires. He is extremely thoughtful. I’m looking forward to trying out the 10 ways to love him better.

  6. I love how my husband can make me laugh. If I’m stressed out and venting to him, instead of trying to fix the problem (when he doesn’t have to) he says something funny to me to make me laugh. It is a great stress relief!

  7. Find the flip side, this is great advice, my husband and I have recently been awakened to how completely different our personalities are and how not being aware of how to communicate with each other has caused a lot of hurt in our relationship. We are working on communication and “finding the flip side” is a great addition!

  8. Karen, my husband pumps my gas, too! He pumps our daughters’ gas, too, so he has really raised the bar for our soon-to-be son-in-laws! I can so relate to what you say about your relationship with your spouse. It sounds like we have similar personalities and so do our husbands.

  9. This so hit the spot with me and my marriage! Couldn’t agree with you more on your perspective. I truly need to pray more for my husband, and not the typical God please change my husband for my benefit prayer, but God make my husband the man you want him to be prayer! Thank you for sharing with wives everywhere!

  10. First off, I want to thank you for sharing this post. My husband and myself are like sandpaper… Really… I always say.. Opposites attract.. and that we are…
    Thanks for the chance to win your book. I am gonna let my husband have off a week from his chores. I will do them. And to pray for him with my alarm reminding me.. and sending him a quick text.

  11. My husband is very sweet and always opens doors for me, and makes sure I have all I need. He helps with household chores and is very supportive of my career and business endeavors.

  12. Thank you for this blog. My husband and I can definitely be described as “Sandpaper Spouses”. Reading your words and suggestions were so encouraging. Thank you for the PDF as well. I am going to try the Flip Side idea. I’m not sure when I began to focus so much on the negative aspects of things, however I’ve come to see how detrimental it is to my marriage. I’ve been working on changing my attitude and thought process these last few days, and have been searching for as many resources as possible to help me. I’ve been praying for my marriage too, which I never did too consistently in the past. I would love to win a copy of your book.

  13. My favorite: make a memorable meal :) It seems that many of our favorite memories are associated with meals… And it is manageable on our budget! Even just taking time to get out the special glasses and dishes and using the placemats makes hotdish more special! :) Thank you for sharing :)

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