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Believing Big When You Feel Small {Giveaway with Suzie Eller}

Today, my friend and Proverbs 31 Ministries partner Suzie Eller is sharing a guest post based on her encouraging new book Come With Me: Discovering the Beauty of Following Where He Leads.

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Believing Big When You Feel Small

share-2-go-with-300x300A well checkup revealed something not quite right, and that led to tests and a biopsy. The doctor assured us that good news was more than likely, so we squeezed the doctor’s appointment onto our calendar.

Unfortunately, the biopsy revealed that Richard had cancer.

A few minutes later we stood in a parking lot. I closed my eyes, holding tight to the man who makes me laugh until I have to run to the bathroom.

The person I love second, after Jesus.

We hadn’t budgeted time for much more than that embrace. Richard had clients waiting. I had women arriving at my home in an hour for Bible study.

Richard and I climbed into our respective cars and turned different directions on Interstate 49. Suddenly I realized that I couldn’t see. I pulled off at the next exit and found a safe place to park. I rested my head on the steering wheel and wept like a baby.

I made it home in time for Bible study.

We gathered around the table and opened our Bibles, flipping to the Scriptures for the day’s study. I numbly read the passage in front of me. It was the story of the second miracle of fishes and loaves.

About this time another large crowd had gathered, and the people ran out of food again. Jesus called his disciples and told them, “I feel sorry for these people. They have been here with me for three days, and they have nothing left to eat. If I send them home hungry, they will faint along the way. For some of them have come a long distance.”

His disciples replied, “How are we supposed to find enough food to feed them out here in the wilderness?” Mark 8:1–4 NLT

Jesus had multiplied a little boy’s lunch into enough to feed thousands just a few days earlier.

Now there’s another opportunity.

Same problem as before. Too many people. Too little food. Not enough faith.

I often write in the margins of my Bible. In bold letters I saw my own words staring up at me.

How did they forget the first miracle so soon?

The page blurred. I stood next to the disciples, except this time I was in a parking lot in Fayetteville, Arkansas, with my arms around my husband.

I had forgotten our first miracle.

You see, twenty-three years earlier, I was sick with cancer.

We beat the odds, and that was a gift. For a long time, I thought that was the big miracle, but later I realized the true miracles came as we dug deep into our faith and came up with enough to make it through the day—or the hour if that was what was required.

That was our loaves and fishes, multiplied beyond our meager supply.

My friends at Bible study didn’t know what to think as I sat there, holding open my Bible, tears dropping onto the page.

In that moment I was a modern-day disciple holding up my not-enough faith.

Faith is birthed in the trenches of our not enough.

Surrendering all that we have from the very beginning is a big move of faith, no matter what we are facing.

Over and over in Scripture, Jesus asks the disciples to give what they don’t seem to have and he calls it BIG.

What Jesus sees as big is different from what we see as big.

When Richard was first diagnosed, I didn’t have enough faith, and it’s okay to acknowledge that. As long as I was willing to give him what I did have. Every hard place. Every strikingly beautiful moment.

What does God want?

All of it.

When we feel small, we carry our “not enough” to God on a regular basis.

Whatever big thing we are facing, God not only sees it, but is waiting for us.

We step toward him with our hands raised high, no-holds-barred, bringing him every uncertainty, every hope, all our fears, all our strength, every aspect of our situation.

The “big” is birthed inside of us as we believe that he can do something with the little that we do have. Whether it leads to a lame man leaping to his feet (healing), a few loaves multiplied by thousands (provision), hymns sung in the darkness of prison (hope), or standing near to Jesus while everything around us seems to fall apart (courage), our faith becomes an anchor.

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BIO: Suzie is a Proverbs 31 Ministries writer, ECPA bestselling author and blogger. She’s been featured on Focus on the Family, Aspiring Women, Harvest Show, 100 Huntley Street, KLOVE, Daystar and numerous other programs. Suzie is a regular contributor to KLRC radio’s Words that Make a Positive Difference.

ComeWithMeCover-194x300She is an author of eight books including her most recent, Come With Me: Discovering the Beauty of Following Where He Leads.When she’s not writing, you can find Suzie playing with her six grandbabies, all under the age of five. Find out more about Suzie and Come With Me: Discovering the Beauty of Following Where He Leads at www.tsuzanneeller.com

To be entered to win a copy of Come With Me leave a comment here telling us what journey you are now on where you need to walk closely with Jesus.

 

 

 

 

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45 Comments

  1. I am on the journey of motherhood of a college student and a high schooler. Spending lots of time on my knees seeking wisdom and guidance.

  2. I am pregnant and having a difficult time. I am nervous about the birth too. But excited to have the baby arrive :)

  3. My journey right now is battling breast cancer. I’m almost done with my treatments and have one more surgery looming.

  4. My mother in law is in the hospital with chest pains. awaiting results from the stress test. Believing God all is well.

  5. My husband and I have just become grandparents for the first time. Our grandson is now 4 months old. It is a wonderful journey to be on even though we are older than a lot of first time grandparents. He brings us lots of joy along with the challenges. Thank you, Lord !

  6. My season consists of trying to start my own business while still working for some one else and for the church. I keep leaning in to Him to show me His design in all of this!

  7. The possibility of a possible job change, IF it happens, it would be a shift in income, BUT I would be working at the school and so closer to my son and home more with him. The struggle is real working 8-5, being single having an active 11 year old boy and going back to school full time…I am need to lose about 120 to get comfortable again and another 30 to be healthy….not to mention the obligations in leading a church class and working in the nursery (at least I get to rock and rest with the babies for two hours ;) ). I know through prayer all things will happen in His time and not mine, but at this right moment I am tired and exhausted and I want to run away to a quiet place and rest.

  8. Sometimes I feel like I’m just trying to hang on for dear life because my life is like a roller coaster of events. Every day just doing the best we can as parents. I often wonder why life is the way it is. But, looking back, I know that I and my family have always been held and lead in ways we didn’t even realize at the moment. Praise God who knows all and is all that we need.

  9. This year we are walking through my husband’s constant pain that no one seem to be able to diagnose, our first miscarriage of baby #10 and me trying to lose 100 lbs to be healthy again. Through it all He is faithful and true and I will keep trusting Him.

  10. My journey is at an interesting point. I am in the midst of my own faith reawakening. I have a renewed thirst for the.things of God and am experiencing growth like no other time in my life. So, the life are abundant, as the enemy tries to distract. I have a young adult child (my prodigal) who is now trying to tell me how to parent. Our #2 is graduating from HS in mere days and he is struggling to define his place in.the world. My husband of 27 years has turned his ears off to all of it. So, I am having LOTS of God conversations.

  11. The journey of being patient, having hope; to stop waiting for everything to be perfect before doing what God has been asking me to do. I have been wanting to move for such a long time, to change locations, but what I really need to be doing now is to MOVE forward in faith, being grateful for what I have, not be discouraged any longer, but rather to pray for the enthusiasm I need to act, to actually ‘walk my talk’. I want to go with Him, to follow where He leads; I want to Trust. I’d love to receive a copy of ‘Come With Me’.

  12. On a journey of trust for my family…many issues that are too difficult to share in a comment but I need big miracles. God is able. He is working in and through me and has shown me that some of the issues are for the spiritual growth of others as well.

  13. First I want to say thank you for sharing this with us today. This has been a good reminder that faith is what I need to keep the most. This past year has been very trying and I am still trying to recover. My husband and I both lost our jobs, and are still struggling to get caught up since he got a new job. Reading this reminded me that I need to have faith in God’s timing.

  14. The journey that I am on right now is a hard one for me and my family. My husband lost his job back in March. We have both been applying for jobs everywhere, just have not had any luck to get one. We have been living on income tax savings, and now we are finally on our last 50 dollars. Its hard to keep the faith cause of the situation were in. We have 4 kids all 5 and under youngest being 8 months. We are losing our rent house cause we are unable to pay, we can’t pay for our car or any other bills. Its been so hard to come to jesus and walk with him, i know i need hold close to him but its hard to see through the dark and see the light of this whole situation. Knowing we have 50 bucks to our name, no place to stay, barely able to buy kids what they want food wise is hard no where to go at the end of the month. I keep wondering why god would let it get this bad. I know this just a trail and i know deep down he will get us through this.

  15. My journey path right now is so Rocky. Having to make choices and changes due to medical issues and work issues. It is hard to have to step away from areas that you enjoy and then wonder if you are doing the right thing. I need God more than ever right now to come along side me and direct me.

  16. My 16 year old step-son told us he thinks he might be gay and he is hanging around with a boy who openly says he is gay. There have been many tears, many conversations about God’s truth and many prayers. The Lord is with us and He is giving me the words to speak to not only my stepson but to his dad and mom.

  17. My journey started nearly 4 years ago with my husband telling me he didn’t love me anymore. No walking out or cheating, but living in the same home with little to no communication. The next summer I went through Alternative Certification to become a teacher. Now, 3 years later I am still looking for the job God has for me to finish my certification. I have passed more tests and attended a DivorceCare class in order to get a job and live with the man that has been my husband. Our darling daughter has Down Syndrome and it has been hard to work as a substitute teacher and take care of her as well.
    After my interview this morning, I am excited about the possibilities of the second interview. My daughter can transfer there also. I know the God is in control and trust in HIm. Learning to keep going in the hard times is the hard part.

  18. I have just begun my doctoral program with a 7 year old son and 2 1/2 year old twins at home. I also have a full-time teaching job and my plate is full. My son struggles in school and life, as he was diagnosed with severe ADHD and a mood disorder. He is the source of many quarrels between my husband and I. I have turned to God for the first time to help me find peace and balance. I have always considered myself a Christian but not religious. I think that I where I have gone astray. I need someone to lean on and I know God can carry my weight.

  19. Lord Jesus! That’s all I can say. He does the incredible and unimaginable EVERY MOMENT. Our God is so faithful and we are so faithless. Our memories are so short. Lord, just keep reminding us all of your faithfulness. Thank you for this timely post!

  20. In the midst of a financial mess. trusting the Lord to provide the means to get above water. I am learning to Be still and wait on His leading. I believe he has told me to go forward with a project but I need my Husband to get on the same page and the money to be provided. So many things but my God is bigger than all of them. Praying that I will get smaller as He moves.

  21. Every part of my life I need to be walking closer with Jesus.

    I’m a homeschooling mom to two precious boys and while we are connected it can still seem very lonely at times. I lost my dad a little over two years ago and the heartache is still so fresh and painful at times. We’re also a blended family with circumstances beyond my control

    It’s easy to just see the surface and dwell on all that’s wrong and become bitter, resentful and angry. But the Lord has been so faithful so many times throughout my life. I know He hasn’t brought me this far to leave me now. I keep praying and crying out to the Lord that He will redeem all that seems so lost. And – eventually He will!

  22. The journey of whether or not to take a certain step in the district that I teach. There has been turmiol. I want to support the players involved but don’t want history to repeat and me get burned in preocess. Is it selfish? What is the calling for me? Can He really want me to be put in that potential positions or do I have the courage in the first place?

  23. The journey I am walking on – loving my brother as he decides to come out as a transgender person. My human mind says this will have a tsunami effect in the family and the ripples will be felt for years. God reassures me that he is enough and not to believe everything I think. HE is in control.

    So many thoughts are running through my mind and so much I could add here, other struggles we are still recovering from events of the last couple of years. It is overwhelming, however I am choosing to trust and am standing on the rock of my salvation. I know I cannot do this without Jesus.

    Thanks for sharing and offering the book. I want to read it regardless of how I receive it. Thank you.

  24. This years journey has brought numerous trips to the dr for stress tests and ekgs, too many boxes of tissues and sleepless nights to count. Betrayed and broken friendships are the hardest. It feels like everything that could go wrong does and when you have one last hope and it’s ruined you feel like a failure. But God! In the midst of everything going crazy around us, God dropped my husbands job into his lap after not having a job for 6mths! Little things are happening around our family of 7 that has been constant reminders that God still sees us!

  25. This past year has been a journey of heartache to joy as we lost our first baby through miscarriage and are now eagerly anticipating the arrival of a healthy baby boy any day now. It’s been hard to trust… But I am looking forward to seeing God’s faithfulness as He sustains this baby as well as this mama’s heart. Thanks for hosting this giveaway and for sharing your heart!

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