When the Waiting is Oh-So-Hard to Do
I have asked my friend and ministry partner, the fabulous Bible teacher Wendy Pope to guest post today on the topic of her new book Wait and See: Finding Peace in God’s Pauses and Plans. Her keen insight into trusting God in the wait will encourage you so much! Be sure to read all the way down to the giveaway!
Wendy writes:
A teacher. A wife. A mother. My little-girl heart dreamed of being all of these one day.
With chalk in hand and glasses resting on my nose, I practiced being a teacher with my stuffed animals. Carol Brady of The Brady Bunch taught me all I needed to know about being a wife. Caring for my dolls, as well as my years of babysitting, prepared me for motherhood. When I graduated from high school, I was ready to put my plans in motion.
Becoming a teacher requires four years of college. Graduated. Got a job. Dream came true.
Becoming a wife requires a fella. Found and dated him for two years. Got a husband. Dream came true.
Becoming a mother requires … well, you know what it requires. No details are necessary. After two years of trying, no baby. Dream didn’t come true.
My first two dreams came to pass just as I had planned. However, after the two years of failing conceive, I wondered if I would ever sing the childhood rhyme, “First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes Wendy with a baby carriage.” Dream number three required me to wait and see.
You need to know something about me: I have never been a wait-and-see kind of girl. Deep down, I am a hurry-up, right-now, please-and-thank-you kind of gal. The word patient does not describe me—ask anyone who knows and loves me. So you can imagine how well I handled waiting to see my dream of motherhood come true. Waiting dominated my thoughts as it does for most of us when we’re waiting for the fulfillment of our hopes and dreams.
And you? Do you feel the tug of waiting for something but are scared to let yourself dream it will happen? Maybe you are waiting on a miracle. We have all been there—sometimes more often than we prefer. And the miracle requires something of us—waiting.
The desire to be a mother consumed me and my thoughts. Why can’t I get pregnant? What is wrong with me? What have I done to warrant such punishment from God? It seemed my girlfriends were getting pregnant with ease. That just didn’t seem fair, so I determined that God wasn’t fair.
I began to decline invitations to the multitude of blue-and-pink parties. My husband and I purposely socialized with friends who were not expecting or didn’t have children. However, avoiding pregnant friends did not ease my pain or subdue my longing.
What have I done to warrant such punishment from God?
Trying harder didn’t help either. For two years, I ingested fertility pills, endured monthly injections, scheduled intimacy, and charted my basal body thermometer readings every morning at six o’clock. There wasn’t a specialist or a test that could explain why I was unable to conceive.
Medically, I was doing everything right; spiritually, I was not. The wait exhausted my faith.
I resolved that God was mad at me, so I resolved to be mad at Him in return. Maybe you can relate? You still go to church on Sunday but have nothing to do with God on the other days ending in y. We have our plans and want our way. When things don’t happen accordingly, we retaliate by ignoring God. I felt this way for over two years as the object of my wait became greater than the Person of my faith.
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See God’s Goodness in the Pauses of Life
When waiting on God stretches for months or years, we begin to doubt God’s promises. Did I hear You correctly, God? Do You see what I’m going through? Why does this have to be so hard?
In Wait and See, Wendy draws on the life of King David to help us…
- Focus on the Person of our faith rather than the object of our wait
- Use biblical truths to defeat depression, doubt, and discouragement
- Release the hold the past has on us
- Prepare for the future by participating in God’s work in the present
- See the benefit of inviting others into the wait
- View God’s pauses as opportunities to know Him better
- Gain confidence in God’s plans, even during uncertain times
If you would like a chance to win a Wait and See gift pack, which includes a copy of the book, a whimsical beaded bookmark with a butterfly charm, and a hand stamped Don’t Rush the Wait aluminum cuff bangle, simply leave a comment on this post telling us an area where you currently find it hard to wait on God.
{Winner will be randomly chosen and announced Monday the 17th.}
Wendy is the wife of Scott, mother of Blaire and Griffin, author, speaker, and Bible study teacher. She loves lazy Sundays watching golf with her husband, thrift-store shopping with her daughter, and watching building shows with her son.
Wendy is the author of Wait and See. She is a contributing author to the Real-Life Women’s Devotional Bible, Encouragement for Today: Devotions for Daily Living, The Reason We Speak, and God’s Purpose for Every Woman. Wendy writes devotions for Proverbs 31 Ministries’“Encouragement for Today” and is a content provider for the free online devotion app First 5 as well as a member of the Proverbs 31 Ministries speaker team.
She leads women all over the world to life change through her in-depth online Bible studies. She has led thousands of women through her Read through the Word study of the One Chronological Bible. Down-to-earth and transparent, Wendy teaches in a way that women feel she is speaking directly to their hearts.
This wait thing is a hot topic. I googled ‘why is waiting so hard’? I got here & I’m so grateful. In a tough season at 60 looking for a job.
I’m a single Mom of a fifteen year old daughter, for years I’ve waited for God to put someone in my life to share the good bad and indifferent with. I’ve realized that I have that someone already, besides my daughter, I have God. I’m so very content today, that I don’t waste “thoughts” on “when”. I know that when I’m supposed to meet the right person, I will. Love this site, thank you
I can’t wait to read this book! As a widow for almost two years, I long to have a companion again, but miss my husband still of course. I feel like I’m just waiting to see what happens next in that area, rather than fully taking in the learning and healing that God has for me in this current moment and stage.
I am waiting for prayers for others to be answered….especially for my friend to find a husband.
(sigh) The hard part for me…watching my kids, 24 and 19, try to figure out life – without God. They were raised in church, but they are trying “life” without fully relying on God. I am waiting for their “AHA” moment – when they realize that faith and God are important.
After teaching in a Christian school for over twenty years, God closed the door. I am waiting for direction. While it seems like an opportunity for change and growth, it is also challenging. For now, I am just waiting…The book sounds encouraging.
I have been going through a divorce for the past 3 years! Everything is not totally settled and I want to get away from this depression that I’m feeling over everything that’s happened. My self esteem was damaged terribly and I have been asking God to help me move forward into the present for the sake of my 10 year old son and myself. Nothing is changing. I’m anxious to read your book and apply to my walk with God which has become weakened.
So much happening….hard to just wait and see…waiting for a change in a situation in my life right now…seems endless but praying for a solution.
I’m new at Christian blogging and am having a hard time waiting on my audience to grow. I want to be at Lysa Terkeurst levels, NOW! But I know true Christian community is something that has to grow organically and slowly — and I’m trying my best to be happy with my small readership as I learn how to do this thing. :)
Waiting for direction for my next season. Trying to be still and not get ahead of the Lord.
My future. I’m at a point where I am unfulfilled and I know he has more out there for me but I’m getting impatient waiting for a sign to send me in the right direction.
I am struggling as we wait for my husbands job situation to be resolved. He got hurt on the job and has been home since March. Working on growing my own business from home. But the unknown gets a bit overwhelming. I declare scripture, pray and surrender and I am desperate to learn what we have to learn and be done with this. Then I remember His timing is perfect, His ways are higher than mine and His thoughts are higher than mine to. I thank Him because my husband could have hurt himself worst and God is healing him.
Wow, where for do I begin……this is where I would say I’ve been waiting for that big career I wanted, had and let slip from me but I won’t because it would be the relationships with my family. I was sexually abused and neglected as a child and thought that I was abandoned by God, even now I wonder but I know that he had me in that situation for a reason….I’m working on now
Waiting 7 1/2 years for marriage restoration and for my husband to return home. I have learned by God’s grace to wait for Him to do his work in our souls instead of me fixing everything. That was a tough one to let go of. I asked God to bring him home only when he is the husband he is intended to be and I am the wife I am intended to be. Through 7 yrs there has been family death, accidents, he got cancer and God healed him, other lifelong illnesses and you would think that would be enough for a person to turn their eyes and heart to Jesus in surrender. No. So I wait. Hit once again with a new kind of waiting. Waiting on a job. Was laid off after 19 yrs of service and God has told me He wants me to wait while he brings the perfect job and the perfect time. That is hard when I am separated and paying all the bills myself. But I thank God each day he provides. he has blessed me so many times and showed me I will never go hungry and never go without a home to live in.
God has had me in a season of waiting. I have been divorced for 14 years and only in the last couple have dealt with the issues that came from it..in doing so I realized I wanted a God-centerd marriage and am waiting for the promise He made me to b fulfilled. Its so hard to wait..but am learning to trust God more and open up to Him more.
And isn’t it a blessing when God shows us our past mistakes, as hard as it is to feel and think about, He shows us what was wrong, how He brought us out of that situation even through divorce only to teach what not to do the next time. I am having to deal with this same issue. God bless you and I pray for you.
I have always issues with being patient. And my biggest wait right now is my husband and i want to move out to the country to be closer to our church and church family. But there isnt land available in our price range. I know that God will guide us to the perfect home and land as soon as hes ready, but i am ready now and its so hard to wait. I cant participate in everything at the church because its about a 45 minute drive right now. So i am trying to be patient, but its hard to do so.