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Marriage Matters

Marriage Matters plus free download at karenehman.com.

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And welcome to those who have clicked your way over from my Proverbs 31 Devotion, Everybody’s Got Somethin’. (If you haven’t read it yet, click here to do so.)


Often, my husband and I just plain rub each other the wrong way. Yep. We’re different. We are what I call “sandpaper spouses” and our rough-around-the-edges relationship often finds us turning to God when we feel like turning away from each other.

Will you join me today in thanking God for sandpaper spouses? Rather than our differences driving us crazy, instead may they drive us all straight to our knees. Now, two freebies for you to encourage you in your marriage:

Facebook Live

In July, my friend, Becky Thompson, blogger and author of Love Unending: Rediscovering Your Marriage in the Midst of Motherhood, was my special guest on Facebook Live. You can watch the recording here.

10 Ways to Love Your Sandpaper Spouse

Enter your email address below and you will receive my free 10 Ways to Love Your Sandpaper Spouse printable in your inbox.

Father, I want to see the differences in my marriage as opportunities for growth as I take my concerns — and my attitudes and responses — to You. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.













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  1. The way the Lord showed me how to overlook my husbands irritating driving tips was to look straight ahead, close my eyes and pray. God gave me a peace and the worst thing that could happen would be that I would open my eyes and be in heaven.. That’s not so bad at all!!!

  2. How do I overlook criticism in the form of humor? I am very afraid my daughter will learn this unloving tactic from my husband. Also, it usually hurts my feelings and I typically don’t confront it. I wish my biggest worry were that he didn’t turn on his blinker. I am good about overlooking the small stuff, but what about the big stuff that wears away at your soul?

    I’ll try on Proverbs 19:11 and let you know how it works out. Think there is more to it in this case. We’ll see.

  3. I’m really struggling with moving past my husband cheating. It has hurt me to my core. I can tell I judge him for every little thing now. I try not to look at the negative in him all the time but it’s so hard because of how much he has hurt me. I don’t know how to let all the negative thinking go and move from the past. Is there hope for our marriage or is it pointless in trying? He says he was wrong and wants us to work, but I have a really hard time believing that and trusting him because what he did consumes my mind. Please help….I feel so alone in all this.

    1. I know it’s hard to let go of the hurt. Every time things cloud my mind I pray, pray, pray. Pray Romans 12:2 and ask God to renew your mind. Be relentless until it’s done. Forgiveness can be hard with infidelity but God expects us to forgive. He knows your pain.

      In Matthew 11:28-30 the Lord tells you He wants to share this burden with you and give you rest. Let Him carry your pain. His grace and mercy are sufficient. One day it will stop consuming your mind. Give it to the Lord every time it happens. He will set you free.

      Philippians 4;4-9 are great verses that help you give it to the Lord and fix your mind on Him. The whole chapter is wonderful. I use these as well and am trying to put them to memory. I even try to replace the negative thoughts with positive ones the verses tell in which you are you to dwell. I speak it all out loud at times. No one is around though:)

      Listen to Christian music. That always helps me refocus on the Lord and His wonderful grace.

      These are the things that help me when my mind wants to take me places it doesn’t need to go. Be mindful of your thoughts and let the Lord give you His peace. Be determined that you are not going to let these thoughts win, but that God will win. Say it out loud! You can get through this with the Power of the Holy Spirit. You can do this!

  4. WOW – looking straight into my heart today! I am critical to my husband quite a bit, but have been working on “keeping it shut”. Thanks! I shared on facebook!!

  5. Maybe because you are not concentrating on his faults when he drives so you don’t have to remind him, by your evil eye, what just bugged you.f

  6. This was like you were looking into my life. I am the blinker police. I think my husband and I have the most arguments in the vehicle. He broke his toe about a month ago so I have been driving and it has been so pleasant. I do notice that I have been overlooking little things more and more. Thank you for sharing

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